Reading Notes for:

How to Win Friends & Influence People

By Dale Carnegie

We live in an era of dramatization.  Facts and figures are not enough.  Your pitch has to be entertaining.
* Visualization adds to receptiveness.

Cash register salesman was trying to demonstrate how a store was losing money by throwing money on the floor.  Sound of pennies hitting floor.

A marriage proposal on knee is more dramatized.

Lady having problems at work had problems getting appointments with boss.  Secretary kept blowing off.  Wrote formal letter that started “I fully understand how busy you are, but it is important.”  Enclosed a form letter with a self-addressed envelope that read “Ms. Wolf, I am available on _____ day at _____ time for _____ minutes.”

  • Said same day for 10 minutes – got one hour.

Charles Schwab, calling on underperforming plant, asked night shift how many heaps they did.  Said company took piece of chalk and wrote company on floor.  Day came in, asked what was, found out and wrote 7 at end.  Night came back and did 8, etc.

**  Win people to your way of thinking

Principal One: Only way to get the best of an argument is to avoid it.
Principal Two: Show respect for the other person’s opinion, never say “you’re wrong.”
Principal Three: If you are wrong, admit it quickly and emphatically.
Principal Four:  Begin in a friendly way.
Principal Five:  Get the other person saying yes immediately.
Principal Six:  Let the other person do a great deal of the talking.
Principal Seven:  Let the other person feel the idea is theirs.
Principal Eight:  Try honestly to see things from other person’s point of view.
Principal Nine:  Be sympathetic to the other person’s ideas and desires.
Principal Ten:  Appeal to the nobler motives.
Principal Eleven:  Dramatize your ideas.
Principal Twelve:  Throw down a challenge.

It’s always easier to hear criticism if framed in something nice.  Start with praise.

Beginning with praise is like a dentist who begins with Novocain.

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